#79 and Other Stuff

I just finished my first goal on my huge list of 101 things.

#79 Finish Jenny's baby book.

Considering she's over two years old and it only covers the first three months of her life, this should have been done a long time ago. But now it is. Yea!

It's at the printers (I like to do memory books rather than scrapbooks as I am not very crafty) and should be mailed to me later this week. Jenny will love it, I'm sure.

Plus, I am actively working on #1-6, 8-9, 17, 30, 53, and 83. Phew. That sounds like a lot, but it's just bits here and there.

It's nice to know that 1-6 will all be over and done with (whether I accomplished them or not) within just a few short weeks, as there's sort of a deadline. James' birth is not something I can schedule or put off. He comes when he comes, and I am so excited to welcome him into my arms!
Brent is out of town again this week. He was also gone last week and the first two weeks of May. He comes home on Friday, not to leave again for a few months. I miss my sweetheart when he is not here. Hopefully I don't take him for granted when he is here. Not only is he good to me and so fun with Jenny, but he's also just dang sexy! And he makes a mean pasta sauce. Mmm. Pasta. Maybe that will be dinner tonight.

My 101 in 1001 List

Pregnancy/Birth
1. Practice fingerdrop/eyes open hypnosis technique 3-5x daily, 6 days a week, until James is born
2. Listen to affirmations 6 days a week until James is born
3. Do one script every day until James is born
4. Prenatal exercises 6x a week until James is born
5. Take supplements (esp. RRL & EPO) daily until James is born
6. Give birth to a healthy boy!

Fitness/Health
7. Eat my greens 5 days a week for 12 consecutive weeks
8. Drink my kefir 5 days a week for 12 consecutive weeks
9. Drink 2-3 liters water every day for 12 consecutive weeks
10. Cardio 3x a week for 12 consecutive weeks
11. Strength training 2x a week for 12 consecutive weeks
12. Lose baby weight by time James is 9 months old
13. Get to ideal weight by James 18 months old
14. Take a yoga class 2x a week for 1 month
15. Take a pilates class 2x a week for 1 month
16. Take zumba class 2x a week for 1 month

Spiritual/Church
17. 100% visiting teaching for 12 consecutive months
18. Read my scriptures for 30 minutes every day, for 30 days
19. Pray twice daily every day for 30 days
20. Prepare Sunday lesson plans a month in advance, a month at a time, for 6 months
21. Hold FHE every week for 12 consecutive weeks
22. Bear my testimony in Sacrament meeting 3 times
23. Attend the temple once a month for 12 consecutive months
24. Read the scriptures with Brent every night for one month
25. Pray with Brent every night for one month

Family/Marriage/Parenting
26. Breastfeed James for 18+ months
27. This one's private ;)
28. Also private
29. Have each sibling+spouse+kids over for dinner
30. Potty train Jenny
31. Help Jenny pick up her room before bed every day for 30 days
32. Go on a date with Brent at least once a month for 12 months
33. Establish daily schedule for kids (play/meal/outdoor/cleaning/quiet time, etc.) and follow it every weekday for a month

Household/Organization
34. Plan meals two weeks in advance for 3 months
35. Complete my morning routine first thing in the morning every day for one month
36. Go to bed with a clean kitchen every night for 30 days
37. Organize baby clothes, label, and store
38. Develop toy organization/rotation system
39. Do one load of laundry every weekday for 4 consecutive weeks.
40. Cook dinner from scratch 3x a week for 12 consecutive weeks
41. Keep office desk clear every day for 30 days
42. Keep Quicken up to date for 3 months
43. Establish budget with Brent
44. Organize recipes
45. Create “reference books” for remodel/decorating ideas, parenting, fhe, primary, home organization, etc.
46. Organize music
47. Declutter every zone in my house
48. Implement zone cleaning into my routine every weekday for 10 consecutive weeks.
49. Finish front garden plan and perennial plantings
50. Keep front garden weed free for one whole season!

Personal
51. Get a new laptop
52. Get up when I wake up every day for 30 days
53. Write in journal or blog once a week for 12 consecutive weeks
54. Get family herbalist certification
55. Take weekly harp lessons for one year
56. Anti-procrastination day once a week for 12 consecutive weeks
57. Floss every day for a month
58. Private
59. Private
60. Read 50 books in one year
61. Read the complete series “The Greatest Books of the 20th Century”
62. Another private one
63. Yet another private one

Food Storage/Emergency Planning
64. Develop 3 month food storage menu
65. Make 1 year food storage inventory/shopping list
66. Organize food storage closet
67. Complete 1 year food storage
68. Complete emergency gear storage
69. 72 hour kits for adults, kids, and pets
70. Living will/power of attorney/other necessary legal documents

Crafts
71. Sew additional Christmas stockings
72. Sew apron for me and Jenny
73. Design and send out James baby announcements
74. Sew tent/canopy for Jenny’s room
75. Design and send out Christmas cards each year

Personal History
76. Label all digital pictures and organize by date/event and archive them
77. Finish mission scrapbooks (journaling, page protectors)
78. Organize personal and family memorabilia
79. Finish Jenny’s baby book
80. Finish Jenny’s 1-3 book
81. Finish James’ baby book & start his 1-3 book
82. Finish engagement/honeymoon book
83. Upload home video footage and make dvds.
84. 365 photo journal (take 1 picture a day for a year)
85. Buy a new camera

Home/Remodel
86. Paint doors & hallway
87. Paint & set up basement bedroom for Jenny
88. Finish wall décor in living room
89. Remodel kitchen
90. Remodel upstairs bathrooms
91. Remodel dining room
92. New flooring in living room
93. Install blinds in office and living room
94. Media & toy storage solution in basement

Just for Fun
95. Rasmussen Ladies’ tea party
96. Go on Alpine slide
97. Take ballroom dance lessons with Brent
98. Take a floral arranging class
99. Take Brent on a romantic overnight trip sans kids
100. Family vacation to Disneyland and/or San Diego
101. Take family to Timpanogos Caves


As I look over my list I'm rather overwhelmed, so it's a good thing I have 1001 days to complete it all. I also just noticed that most of my goals are more habits I want to develop, rather than things I want to do. Anyhow, I suppose I'll have to plug away pretty consistently in order to get it all done, otherwise time will sneak up on me and I'll be three years older and still not have my food storage done.

I'm excited, though. I love lists, and here is my ultimate to-do list. Well, I shouldn't say ultimate. There are lots of things not on here that I'd like to do someday, but that's what future years hold for me.

The point is that I'm hoping to reign in my procrastination tendencies. We all have them. I'm hoping that as I consistently work toward my goals not only will I live more providently, but I'll have more feelings of satisfaction, fulfillment, and contentment. As long as I'm making progress I'll feel good about that.

101 in 1001

So I just recently learned about this project to complete 101 goals in 1001 days. I must admit that the idea of this really appeals to me as a list maker. I love to make lists. It gives me a great feeling of accomplishment to cross things off. I make lists for menus for the week, things I want to buy, home improvements I want to do, things I want to learn, things I want to teach, habits I want to form; you get the idea.

Here's some more about the project, taken directly from the website www.dayzeroproject.com.

The Mission: Complete 101 preset tasks in a period of 1001 days.

The Criteria:Tasks must be specific (ie. no ambiguity in the wording) with a result that is either measurable or clearly defined. Tasks must also be realistic and stretching (ie. represent some amount of work on my part).

Why 1001 Days? Many people have created lists in the past - frequently simple goals such as New Year's resolutions. The key to beating procrastination is to set a deadline that is realistic. 1001 Days (about 2.75 years) is a better period of time than a year, because it allows you several seasons to complete the tasks, which is better for organising and timing some tasks such as overseas trips or outdoor activities.

Some common goal setting tips:
1. Be decisive. Know exactly what you want, why you want it, and how you plan to achieve it.
2. Stay Focused. Any goal requires sustained focus from beginning to end. Constantly evaluate your progress.
3. Welcome Failure. Frequently, very little is learned from a venture that did not experience failure in some form. Failure presents the opportunity to learn and makes the success more worthy.
4. Write down your goals. It clarifies your thinking and reinforces your commitment.
5. Keep your goals in sight. Review them frequently, and ensure that they are always at the forefront of your thinking.

I'm going to use my blog as a sort of accountability forum for myself. I'm still working on my list of 101 things, but I'll post it soon. Then I'll post updates about my progress and let you all know how I'm doing. (I'm sure you're all vitally interested in my personal growth and goal-reaching process.)

If you're interested in joining me, I'd love to see what's on your list and help encourage you to get there.

They're Penetrating the Bureaucracy!

Anyone remember this well-written scene from The Incredibles? It begins with Bob Parr being pulled in to see his boss. Bob works for Insuricare, a medical insurance company.

Mr. Huph: I'm not happy, Bob. Not. Happy. Ask me why.
Bob Parr: Okay. Why?
Mr. Huph: Why what? Be specific, Bob.
Bob Parr: Why are you unhappy?
Mr. Huph: Your customers make me unhappy.
Bob Parr: What, you've gotten complaints?
Mr. Huph: Complaints I can handle. What I can't handle is your customers' inexplicable knowledge of lnsuricare's inner workings! These people are experts! Experts, Bob! Exploiting every loophole, dodging every obstacle! They're penetrating the bureaucracy!
Bob Parr: Did I do something illegal?
Mr. Huph: [reluctantly] No.
Bob Parr: Are you saying we shouldn't help our customers?
Mr. Huph: The law requires that I answer no.

Well, Brent and I have penetrated the bureaucracy of United Health Care. We've learned it's all about knowing "the inner workings" or the secret passwords and handshakes, as it were.

The birth center I am going to found a letter in their insurance files for me that makes quite nice ammunition. Apparently earlier this year another client of theirs had beaten UHC into submission and got them to pay at in-network levels for both the birth center and the midwife that attends there. They reluctantly agreed to this after admitting that there were no other providers in the client's geographical area that offered the same services.

Really???

Anyway, the letter was from UHC to the birth center giving notification of their intention to pay in full.

YEA!!!!

So armed with this information Brent called the insurance company. It only took about an hour on the phone and talking to three different people, but we think we will soon be victorious. At first it was "I'm sorry, sir, I just don't know what the procedure would be for that", or "Oh, I think it's this other department that you need to talk to". So after going back and forth between Care Coordination and Benefits someone happened to slip out the phrase coverage gap exception.

Eureka! We discovered the secret password that would allow us to at least start the process of what it is we want. Since people working in such large organizations aren't allowed to think for themselves and can only read from a script, you have to use their special vernacular for them to get to understand you.

So Brent went back to Care Coordination and asked for a "coverage gap exception". Suddenly they knew what he was talking about. They explained that this meant that in order to qualify there had to be no in-network providers that provided the same service. Yes, he agreed to that. The process was begun.

Then he was asked for my diagnosis. Umm. Isn't that kind of obvious considering he was requesting to go to a birth center? Anyway, he said "my wife is having a baby". Long pause on the other side of the phone. Brent could hear the woman rolling her eyes as if to say "Yeah right, there's nowhere within 30 miles of your residence for you to give birth."

So Brent said "You'll find there are lots of hospitals in the surrounding area in-network, but there are no birth centers."

Long pause.

"Huh." Again do we hear the rolling of eyes and the passing of judgment?

"Oh, yeah. You're right. Okay."

So, long story (sorry about that) short: we think they're gonna cave. They said the request had to be processed and they'd send a letter to us and the birth center in a week or two.

The moral of the story? It's a pain in the arse, but it is possible to "penetrate the bureaucracy" if you are dogged enough to learn the secret passwords.

Go forth and conquer.

Turn Down the Dial

A month or so ago I was in a church meeting where the concluding speaker gave a thought that has swirled around in my brain ever since. I'll summarize his remarks.

Think about your dial of negative emotion. Call it a rating system if you like. Imagine that you're driving to work in the morning, you are rushed, running late for an important meeting, traffic is terrible, and you blow a tire. There you are on the side of the freeway, cars zooming past. It's hot and windy and you're late and you don't have time for this. Not to mention the expense of getting a new tire. ARGH!!!!! What's your rating out of 10? A 6? A 7? An 11? How often do you feel like you are beyond the highest rating of frustration? Keep in mind that the dial only goes to 10, and yet you rate yourself beyond it.

What if instead of blowing a tire you were in a car crash that killed your loved ones. If that's a 10 (sorry, I'm not giving you more than 10; the dial stops there) then what does your tire blowing incident become. A 2, maybe?

His point was that we need to turn down the dial of negative emotion in our lives. We need to have proper perspective when dealing with life's inevitable frustrations and troubles. Our society has become so stressful that we operate on a higher level of tension all the time. It also has become so self-centered that we think that everything should go our way all the time. When it doesn't we feel put upon, cheated, mistreated, etc. We complain about the sense of entitlement that people seem to have nowadays, but fail to recognize it in ourselves.

If we could turn the dial down and consciously choose to interpret our struggles as something to be dealt with rather than a catastrophe sent to ruin us, then we would have much greater happiness in our lives. Don't we all want that? It is up to us to choose to live after the manner of happiness. We must choose to act, rather than be acted upon.

So that's become my mantra lately:

"Turn down the dial of negative emotion."

I Need to Vent

So I hate the medical institution in this country. I'm not saying that national health care is necessarily the way to go, but AAARGH!!

With Brent's new job comes new insurance. This new insurance company will not pay for me to go to the birth center I've been planning on. I understand that they have their network and want their clients to receive service within the network, yadda yadda yadda. I'm good with all that.

However, I think that all alternatives should be considered when building a network. They tout one of the largest networks in America, so I will have my choice of the best physicians and hospitals in the nation. Well that's just fine and dandy if I need a physician or a hospital. However, I need neither. What I need is a midwife and a birth center.

So even though the birth I am planning on will only cost about $2000 total and the average unmedicated and complication-free hospital birth costs about $6000-$7000 (we're not even talking about the "what if" scenarios that are so much more likely to take place in a hospital anyway, which up the cost significantly), the insurance company isn't interested. Why save money when you have political relationships to maintain?

When is America going to learn that pregnancy and birth are natural and normal and healthy events, not illnesses that the woman needs rescuing from? If a pregnant woman is high-risk then OF COURSE she should go to a hospital to deliver her baby. But for the 80% of us who are perfectly fine and healthy, we should have more options.

I realize that most women think I'm crazy and wonder why on earth I would even consider birthing without an epidural. Well, I'm not here to convince you, though believe me, I have my reasons. I think that choosing a hospital birth and anesthesia is a perfectly valid option for many women. However, I also think women are nuts who don't bother to educate themselves about the potential risks of even the most common of obstetrical interventions. How can you claim to be giving informed consent if your doctor doesn't inform you of the risks as well as the benefits? Only when you know both sides of the story do you really have a choice.

In this country of wealth and education we should have better options. We should have true informed consent. We should have people who are empowered to take control of their own medical care. We should not have insurance companies and politicians deciding what is best for us or what care we should receive!

Of course we are all free to pursue our own care outside of the insurance world, but at a steep price. Ancient remedies that have been proven over centuries to be effective (acupuncture, herbal medicine, etc.) are not covered by most insurance policies. If traditional western medicine has failed a person, they are left alone to suffer or seek expensive alternative care that they usually cannot afford.

There is something wrong with this picture.

Rant over.

Pregnancy Update

As of today I am 33 weeks +3 days pregnant. Where did my time go? I'm not complaining, oh no, not at all. I'm thrilled to be so close to meeting my little JJ. I am, however, starting to hit that point in pregnancy where there is more discomfort than delight.

I can't sleep well, though that's not really a change. It's just that now the poor sleeping is accompanied by aching hips and reflux. As my pelvis loosens at the seams I feel very unsteady whenever I get up from sitting or reclining. Plus the pressure of my uterus and all it contains makes whichever hip I'm laying on HURT!

I'm able to walk less, carry less, accomplish less, etc. I can't hold Jenny like she wants me too, and I feel bad about that. Poor little girl. Her world is going to be rocked when James arrives. Hopefully she'll be excited about the prospect of being a helpful big sister rather than feeling totally displaced.

I went for a hike with Brent and Jenny a week or two ago. I went maybe three miles and the first half was pretty steep switch-backs. I went slow, took it easy, and was able to just make it.

Today I went for a walk on a flat, paved path and could hardly hold my own body up. We went maybe one mile. I need to get back into my prenatal yoga; it helps so so so much with energy and discomfort.

The positive aspects of pregnancy are significant enough that I don't really mind the uncomfortable bits too much. For one thing, pregnancy completely eliminates my chronic migraines. Hallelujah, praise the Lord!!!! I do occasionally have a tension headache, but it is always much milder than when I'm not pregnant. Also, the normal back pain and other fibromyalgia related junk I have to put up with is also greatly minimized. I figure God realizes that pregnancy is enough to deal with and he blesses me by temporarily removing my other physical obstacles. I am grateful.

As an aside, I think that all parking lots should not only have handicapped spaces, but senior citizen and expectant mommy spaces reserved as well. Anyone want to sign a petition?