Is it Okay to Hate My Cat?

I consider myself an animal lover. I grew up with dogs and loved it. I like many other animals, but have never lived with any animal other than a dog, until I married into a cat. I wasn't thrilled at the prospect, but was willing to be open about it. Because I am an animal lover, after all. Right?

I've been perpetually congested for almost four years, ever since I moved into a cat house. Usually it's not too bad, but sometimes I can't breathe at night, and therefore can't sleep.

Sometimes my eyes itch really bad and that also affects my sleep.

My basement smells, because that's where the litter box is. There is litter on my stairs all the time. As soon as I vacuum it up it is redeposited. What's the point?

He jumps on my table and counters when I'm prepping food. He licks the butter. He is a messy eater and there's crusty cat food all over my floor. Keeping it cleaned up is like cleaning up the litter.

Nearly every night at approximately 2:00 a.m. he comes meowing at my door and wakes me up. Sleep is elusive enough for me that any additional and unnecessary interruptions makes me want to shriek out all the cuss words in my lexicon (which aren't very many).

He likes to sleep on my bed and gets his allergens all over my duvet and pillows. More sleep trouble.

He likes to go outside and come back inside many, many times a day, and I have to let him out, let him in, let him out, let him in.

He likes to drink running water directly out of the faucet. He will sit on the bathroom counter and wait for me to pass by. When I do he has the most loud and annoying meow that hits a pitch that is exceedingly grating.

When he doesn't get me to turn on the faucet for him, he will drink out of the toilet. As a result, muddy and wet paw prints cover the toilet seat. Of course I don't notice until AFTER I sit down.

Did I mention my basement smells? I thought it was just the litter box. Well, I recently discovered that he has been using my music closet as a litter box. He's been a little sick lately, and as a result I found dried/crusty and also fresh/wet kitty poop (well formed, and also runny diarrhea) all over my kindermusik scarves, some bells, a grass skirt, various other props, the wall, ground into the carpet, and stuck in the track for the sliding doors. It took me two hours to clean up. It was gross. It was the final straw that made me think maybe I do hate him after all.

But he is really pretty. And he does occasionally sit on my lap and purr. He is also a (relatively) harmless animal that needs a home and caretakers to feed him and shelter him and give him love the 2 minutes a day he wants it. I feel responsible for him. I feel like I shouldn't have such negative feelings towards an animal that is just following his instincts. He can't help that he's annoying and evil. It's who he is.

I, however, am a human with higher functioning brain power and reasoning abilities. I have the ability to control my instincts and NOT kick him across the room. Focus on that. Focus on that. I love animals. Even Loki. Right?